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Submissive

A person who prefers to be subordinate in a D/s relationship, obeying, serving, and pleasing their Dominant partner. Submissive is the broadest term in the submissive / slave / property panoply. All slaves are submissives and all who describe themselves as property are submissives but not all submissives are slaves or property of an owner. Self-describing as a submissive does not necessarily mean that the person already has a dominant. Instead, submissive describes a preference for taking the submissive role in a relationship or in a BDSM scene and operates as a type of self-description or self-advertisement.

The term bottom is in turn a more general than "submissive", and also includes people who take a passive role in BDSM activities that don't include obedience or service.

The everyday definition of the word "submissive" is: "characterized by tendencies to yield to the will or authority of others" (Merriam-Webster). The bdsm and M/s definition of submissive differs from the everyday definition of submissive in the following ways:

• Submissive in BDSM and O&P is commonly used as a noun and this is a correct usage within these subcultures.
• The word submissive in the BDSM world is considerably more protean than the ordinary use of the word. Submissive in the everyday sense is an adjective describing a fixed personality feature exhibited in all interactions with others. In the vanilla world "submissive" commonly refers to a set of traits that is manifested whenever the person interacts with anyone. Within BDSM or O&P the word "submissive" refers only to that person's relationship to their own dominant or potential dominants they wish to form a relationship with. In other words, some very non-submissive people in the vanilla world commonly describe themselves as submissive when referring to their relationship with a dominant or when describing themselves in BDSM or O&P.

Submissive is sometimes used as a counter-example to the term "slave", if submissives are described as people who have rights within their D/s relationship, including the right and ability to leave if the relationship becomes difficult or unpleasant. Within a D/s relationship submissives may have the ability to negotiate the terms of their submission on a moment to moment basis and have expectations of their owner on how they should be treated. These expectations are taken very seriously by both the dominant and the submissive. They may be described in a written document which both parties are expected to adhere to or they may be verbal agreements that are subject to frequent re-negotiations.

See also

• Slave
• Bottom
• Property
• Dominant
• Ongoing voluntary submission

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